


Setting Him Up

by orphan_account



Category: Captain America (Movies), Marvel, Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: Awesome Clint Barton, Bucky Barnes Needs a Hug, Bucky Barnes Recovering, Bucky Barnes Remembers, Clint Barton Is a Good Bro, Frenemies Bucky Barnes & Sam Wilson, M/M, Natasha Romanov Is a Good Bro, Oblivious Steve Rogers, Post-Avengers: Age of Ultron (Movie), Steve Rogers & Natasha Romanov Friendship, Steve Rogers & Sam Wilson Friendship, Steve Rogers and the 21st Century
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-02-22
Updated: 2019-03-30
Packaged: 2019-11-04 01:00:23
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 8
Words: 14,505
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17888546
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: When Bucky turns up at Steve's apartment first thing in the morning, Steve couldn't be happier. His best friend is back, and recovering from what happened.Bucky is still trying to remember his former life. He is trying to adapt to the modern world, one completely different to what he remembers. But he's getting there.Later that day, Steve agrees to let Natasha set him up. What harm could it be?





	1. Chapter 1

‘How about her? She's kinda cute,’ Natasha nodded towards the waitress at the table opposite. 

‘You know I'm not interested Nat,’ Steve said, exasperated, 'Why do you keep asking?’ 

‘You haven't seen anyone for 70 years, Steve. I'm just trying to help you out.’

‘To be fair, most of that time I was frozen, so it's not like I had a choice.’

‘Even so…’ She hesitated, thinking, ‘You can’t shoot me down forever. Can you at least think about it?’

\---

Steve was leaving his Brooklyn apartment the next morning when he ran into him. 'Bucky?’ Steve had been trying so hard to find his friend since what happened in Washington, but the Winter Soldier knew how to avoid being found. 

‘I remember you,’ Bucky Barnes said, staring at him with a slight look of confusion on his face, 'You were my best friend.' 

'Yes! I am. I'm with you till the end of the line, ya know.’ He grinned. 

Bucky furrowed his brow, seemingly more confused than ever. ‘But you never looked for me when they took me. You did nothing when I fell. On that bridge, when we fought, you acted like saving me was more important than your own life. But you never tried to save me before.’

'I…’ Steve stopped, concerned, 'I thought you were dead Buck. You fell so far, how could you not have been? I crashed into the Arctic soon after. I've only been back for a few years myself, and ever since I found out you were alive, I've been trying so hard to find you.’ 

‘Oh.’ There was a somewhat awkward silence. 'Well, I guess you didn't need to find me. I came and found you.’

‘Do you want to come in?’ It was the only thing Steve could think of to say.

'Sure.’ The pair walked back up the stairs and entered the apartment.

'It's not much, but it's home,’ Steve said as Bucky looked around, smiling when he saw some of Steve's drawings on the wall, an old gramophone on the drawer below them. Even though the apartment was far nicer than what he grew up in, it reminded him of life before the war and was almost bittersweet to him.

'Not much? My memory isn't at its best, but this is a mansion next to what we grew up in!’ 

'Well that's for sure,’ He smiled. The tension that had been there before was disappearing. 'So, how've you been hiding from me this whole time?’

'It wasn't that hard, I was barely hiding. You just need to pay more attention! We crossed paths every week or so, but you've only noticed me now when I wait outside your door. Good lord Stevie! You're supposed to save the nation from threats but you can't spot your best friend! Makes me question the sense of them who picked you.’

‘Neither of us would be alive if they'd picked someone else though, so maybe they had some brains.’

Bucky laughed, a sad smile playing across his face. 'True that,’ he replied, and soon they were laughing together like they had never left the 40’s. 

An hour flew by before Steve noticed. 'Guess there's no time for my jog, Sam's gonna kill me.’

'You mean the one with the wings? That guy you speed past yelling “On your left”? I doubt he'll mind having a day without that.’

'How do you know about that?’

'As I said, we crossed paths a lot and you never noticed. I may have watched that happen once or twice. It was pretty fun to watch. Seems like the punk's now the jerk.’

‘Jerk. Anyway, I'm sorry but I need to get to an Avengers meeting, do you want to come back later? It's good to have ya back.’ 

'It's good to be back.’ 

He was smiling more than he had in years as he bent to grab his shield and left.

\---

‘You’re late Cap. We started without you,’ Tony Stark told him when he got to the Avengers Tower. 

'I was busy.’ Steve decided not to mention Bucky, at least, not immediately. 'What’d I miss?’

'New Hydra base to attack, another alien turned up, this time in Jersey. Deciding the teams now, if you'd care to join us.’

They went into the meeting room, where the rest of the Avengers were waiting. Natasha was sitting on one of the sofas, apparently deep in thought. Next to her, Clint was taking up the rest of the sofa, drinking coffee. Wanda was, as usual, talking quietly to Vision on the other sofa.

‘Aren’t soldiers supposed to be on time?’ Clint asked jokingly.

‘They are,’ Rhodey called from the back of the room, 'Seems like I'm a better soldier.’ Colonel Rhodes somehow always managed to find a way to 'prove’ he was the better soldier.

‘If I remember right, you were late last week Barton,’ Steve replied. 'So you can't comment.’

'Who's gonna trust the memory of a 90-something-year-old though? And I'm not a soldier. I can be as late as I like.’

'Can we just finish bickering and get back to business?’ Natasha rolled her eyes, 'You boys need to grow up.’

‘I dunno Nat, I don't think the Captain wants to be much older than he is,’ Clint was the only one to laugh. That happened a lot. 'And no, I'm not stopping with this,’ He added when he noticed Steve's glare. 

'Anyway,’ Steve glared at Clint for a moment more, 'How are we teaming up for these missions?’

'Well, I think it would be a good idea to split Cap and Barton up for this one,’ Tony said. 'And I'm on the team attacking Hydra. My team'll have five. Anyone have requests?’ 

‘I need a break from kicking Hydra asses, I'm on Team Jersey,’ Sam said.

‘Ok, how about you, Cap, and Natasha go to Jersey.’ The team agreed.

'Just like Washington. You guys want to set off now?’ Sam asked.

'Who made you boss?’ 

‘First in best dressed Steve. Let's get this over with.’

The three left the tower a minute later. As he got into the car, Steve's eyes widened, stopping with one foot in. 'I just remembered something I need to do. I'll be back in twenty minutes or so.’ He ran back, planning to put a note on his door in case Bucky came back. He didn't want Bucky to go to the apartment and wait for him while he was busy for who knew how long.

'What's got into him today? He didn't jog, he was late, and now he's running off right before a mission?’ Sam asked, not expecting an answer.

‘Something good happened this morning, I don't know what, but I haven't seen him in such good spirits in a while, if ever.’ Natasha replied, 'And I'm gonna find out. Top priority.’

'What about the alien?’

‘That’s your job, Mr I'm-in-charge-now.’

'Great, I'm stuck with Captain Preoccupied and Natasha 'Your job, not mine’ Romanoff.’

‘Come on, you know you'll love bossing Steve around.’

'That’s true.’ They stood there for a while, silent. ‘Look who's back. Captain Preoccupied.’

'Well, you just gonna stand there, or are we going to Jersey?’

'An explanation Steve?’ Sam asked, 'You can't just run off right before a mission.’

'Sympathy for the vet please Sam? That's kind of your other job.’ Steve got into the car. 'Now, do I need to take control of the mission, or are you coming?’

The alien was far easier to bring down than expected, it only took ten minutes. 'Do you guys want to have a bite to eat before we head back?’ Natasha asked. 'There’s no point having driven this far only to go back straight away. Besides, that place there looks nice.’ 

'Sure, I could do with something to eat. Didn't have much breakfast.’ Steve's reply was met with a look of concern from Sam. 

'We know something’s up, Steve. Do you mind telling us what?’

'It's nothing. Just had a little bit of a surprise when I went to go for a jog.’

'But you weren't there? I kinda noticed that no one was lapping me every twenty seconds.’

‘Yeah, I got sidetracked.’ He hastily changed the topic, asking what movie he should try watching next. He loved Disney, he had watched the earlier films in the cinema as a teen, but the others (namely Tony and Clint) often got a kick out of him not having watched other classics, and he was trying to understand the modern world, no mean feat with all the pop culture references.

They ate lunch in the cafe, casually chatting.

'How's it going with your girlfriend Sam?’ Natasha asked. Her eyes flickered to Steve for a second, trying to gauge his reaction. 

‘Pretty good. It's our anniversary next week.’

'Good for you! Steve? You gonna let me set you up?’

'Maybe, not quite there yet though.’

'You're still trying to set him up? Good luck, it won't be easy to find someone. Probably all too young for him.’ Sam laughed, and Steve's face flickered for a second. 

Natasha smiled, thinking that comment would help Steve make up his mind to let her set him up. Even so, she knew it was time to change the topic. ‘Any progress looking for Bucky?’

'Well, um,’ Steve hesitated. He wasn't sure he wanted to mention it quite yet, but he knew he wasn't a good liar.

'Well?’ Natasha asked, sure she was close to figuring out what was going on. ‘Wait, is it something about Bucky that's got you so preoccupied?’ She had narrowed it down to a few options over the conversation and was now almost certain it was about Bucky.

'Ur, yeah.’ There was no point trying to hide the truth now. 'He kinda turned up outside my door this morning. We talked for ages, I completely forgot about my jog, and I didn't notice how fast the time flies.’ He was grinning now, becoming more and more happy by the second. 'He remembers! Not everything, of course, not yet, but he remembers a lot.’

‘Wait, he found you?’ Sam asked, surprised. The Winter Soldier certainly hadn't seemed like he wanted to be around when they'd met and fought in Washington. ‘He turned up at your place and you hadn't even known he was in the city?’

'I guess his, er, missions have needed some secrecy, he'd know how to not be found.’

'You guess? Russian training revolves around secrecy! And, of course, learning to kill mercilessly.’ Natasha added. 'It would not have been hard to hide from you Steve, I doubt you would ever have found him yourself.’

'Wow, thanks. Everyone's just showering me in compliments today,’ Steve said dryly, although he knew it was true. He had honestly thought Bucky had left the country and had been days away from stopping searching.

They soon left the cafe and starting the drive back to New York. Steve was staring out the window, thinking about how much the world had changed since the 40s. There were skyscrapers where there used to be parks and the streets were constantly bustling. Back then, a date was a dance with someone you had already met, now dancing was no longer a thing and people were often set up by a friend with someone they'd never even seen. The world was a different place, he thought, maybe he should try to change with it. On an impulse, he decided to let Natasha set him up with someone. 'Hey, Nat,’ he stopped for a second, the slightest reluctance, but decided that no, he had to do this, ‘You wanted to set me up with someone? I'll do three dates.’

Natasha smiled as Sam stared at Steve, shocked. ‘Knew you'd come around.’


	2. Chapter 2

Bucky stayed in Steve's apartment for a short while after Steve left. He took a closer look at the drawings on the wall, smiling as he saw the updrawing of Captain America as a show monkey. Beside it was one of the Howling Commandos, one of Peggy, even one of the flying car from the World Expo they'd been to before he left. He realised then that almost all of the drawings were from the war, or were based on those times. Poor Stevie, he thought, still stuck in the past even though he has a home here. Maybe it wasn't a good idea for him to have visited, maybe he'd just make matters worse.

_An alleyway. A small boy backed into the corner. A taller man punching him. Bucky walked up to the man. ‘Not my Steve you don't.’ The man laughed. 'I'll do what I want, thank you very much’. Bucky punched him. He and Steve ran. 'Are you ok?’ 'Of course Buck. You don't need to protect me.’_

Memories had started coming back a year ago, but he was never ready for them. He didn't need to have a flashback to know how he would have replied. ‘When you're getting that beat up, yes, I do pal. I'm with you till the end of the line.’ 

'Till the end of the line,’ He muttered to himself, realising he didn't want the line to end yet. 

\---

He took a cab to Central Park, wanting somewhere to relax that wasn't a huge connection to the past, somewhere with people, but not crowded. After he started recovering, he was uncomfortable surrounded by crowds and noise, but he also didn't want to live in solitude. He walked past a family, unconsciously trying to hide his metal arm. He sat on a bench a fair bit from everyone else, smiling as he watched a squirrel run past, kids playing frisbee on the lawn, a girl setting up a picnic rug. A woman walked towards him, asking if she could take a seat. 'Sure.’ Maybe it would be a good thing for him to have people to talk to. 'How are you ma'am?’ Maybe he sounded a bit too old fashioned, but he wasn't sure how else to address her.

'Oh, um, I'm kinda dating already, and even if I wasn't, I'm not interested in guys.’ She felt awkward, thinking she should get up and walk away.

‘Sorry, I didn't mean to sound like I was asking you out. I'm not really in that place at the moment.’ Bucky was curious though, what had she meant by not being interested in men? 'I had a bit of an old fashioned upbringing,’ Well, that certainly wasn't a lie, 'What do you mean by not into men? I'm sorry if I shouldn't be asking.’

'Just how old fashioned was your family? It means I like girls.’ She was shocked at the fact he had to ask, it was the 21st century after all.

'Oh.’ He smiled. One thing he loved about the modern day was that people were free to be who they are. Although the fact that you could be openly gay, that people wouldn't judge, made him happier than anything else new. He wasn't sure why this was. Maybe there was someone he used to know who was gay, who would have needed the freedom? One of the Commandos maybe? 'I'm Bucky Barnes by the way.’

‘Well, I guess that explains that. I'm Chloe.’ Chloe seemed to move slightly further away from him. Everyone knew about his being the Winter Soldier now, and he was used to people being uncomfortable around him when they realised who he was. She pulled out her phone, starting to text someone, and he decided to leave. 

\---

He returned to Steve's apartment that evening, trying to escape the crowds of the city. There was a sign on the door. 'Hey Buck, I might not be back for a while, on a mission. I'm sorry, but there's some alien that needs containment. I'll be back as soon as I can.’ He frowned. Did Steve not want him around? Becoming the Winter Soldier had made him struggle to trust people, but he'd thought he could trust Steve. Now though, he was having doubts. The world was becoming more peaceful, there were barely ever threats worthy of the Avengers. For there to be one right after he came seemed way too coincidental. He left, feeling tears in his eyes. He had been so hopeful this morning, happier than he could remember, and it seemed to all have been a lie a few hours later. He walked down the street and was about to turn the corner when he heard his name. 

'Bucky?’ He turned around, and there was Steve. He hadn't been lying to avoid him! He realised how ridiculous it was of him to think that he had been.

'I just left your building, can't you be five minutes faster? How was the mission?’

'Easier than I thought it would be. Took only ten minutes.’

'But you’ve been out for hours?’

‘There was no point going all that way to only spend ten minutes there. We had lunch. Oh, and did some training in the tower.’ They entered the apartment. 'You mind if I cook some spaghetti?’ Steve asked, 'I’m quite hungry.’

'Fine by me, as long as you give me some too.’ Bucky sat on the sofa, thinking about how to phrase what he wanted to say. 'I met this girl today. She-’

'Back to your flirting with every girl in Brooklyn self then?’ he said jokingly and then added, almost as an afterthought, ‘You know, I've finally decided to move on after Peggy. Natasha's going to set me up with some gals.’

'About time Stevie, it's only been 70 years.’ He was smiling, although it felt fake. He wasn't as happy as he should have been to hear this, and he didn't know why. There was something he couldn't remember. Or maybe it was just jealousy? He had always been the one girls liked, but he knew that now no-one would prefer him to his best friend. But no, he didn't miss going dancing with a new girl every week. What was still forgotten? He was confused, he knew he'd forgotten something really important, but he couldn't guess what it could possibly be. Unless… No, that couldn't be what it was. He avoided even thinking about the possibility, ashamed he'd think it possible. Steve was his best friend, it couldn't be that. He'd know if it was that.

'Does everyone seriously forget that I wasn't able to do anything almost all of that time?’

‘No, no-one forgets, it's just fun watching you get worked up about it.’

'Jerk.’

'Punk,’ He paused. 'Anyway, what I was going to say was that she was openly gay, not that I was flirting with her. It's amazing how much the world's changed since the war.’

‘Wait, people are allowed to be open about that? They're not judged? How have I only just found out about that?’ Steve was as happy as Bucky had been to hear this. 

'Well, you are pretty clueless, I'm honestly not that surprised.’

'Wow, thanks Buck.’

'You’re welcome.’ 

Steve went back to the kitchen to set up for dinner, and Bucky tried to decide whether to ask a favour. It didn't seem fair for him to do so since he'd only just popped up, but he was getting sick of motels. ‘Hey, Stevie,’ he asked when he was handed a plate of spaghetti, 'Can I stay here for the night? I haven't got an apartment, I've been staying in cheap motels this whole time, and I'd really like to have somewhere better to sleep. Even just the couch.’

'Sure Bucky, you'll have to sleep on the couch for now, but I can buy a bed for you tomorrow if you'd rather,’ Bucky looked like he was about to protest, so Steve quickly added, 'Before you say anything, my bank account has been collecting interest this whole time, and I got compensation for being missing in action for 70 years, so I can afford to buy something like that for you. Plus,’ He added as an afterthought, ‘Stark is rolling in cash, I can ask him for some if I really need. He assumes that I'm poor, so it's not that hard to get money off him.’

'What happened to honest patriot Steve? You're lying to people?’

'More like concealing information. And he's too rich for his own good.’

Late that night, Bucky lay on the couch, ready to sleep, but not wanting to face what came with being asleep. He rested, eyes open, trying to avoid sleeping while still saving himself from exhaustion. He hadn't thought staying over through. He hadn't mentioned his nightmares, or that he always woke up screaming. Eventually, he succumbed to sleep, and before he knew it it was morning. It took him twenty minutes to realise this was the first time in the past year he'd had a full night's sleep, uninterrupted by nightmares.

'You want to join me and Sam for a jog this morning?’ Steve asked as he made his breakfast. 'You said it's enjoyable to watch us jog? Trust me, it's way more fun to do!’

'You’ve changed, you'd never have done this before the war.’

'Well, I'm not quite sure why, but I have a feeling I wasn't exactly capable of doing so,’ Steve drily replied. 'So, you coming?’

'You have to ask?’

Half an hour later, Steve was jogging with Sam ('I’m a bit tired today, need to go slow.’), when someone sped past. 'On your right!’ Bucky said, laughing, 'You’re right Steve, this is great!’

Steve left Sam behind to keep pace with Bucky. Sam yelled after them, 'You set this up? Really?’

'Yep. No regrets!’ Steve replied, shouting over Bucky's laughter.

Half an hour later, the three of them sat down. Sam was annoyed, as well as exhausted. 'You can't just do this to me every time you find someone as fast as you.’

'It’s the first time Sam. And you seem to get along with 100 year olds you meet because they're lapping you.’

'I’d be worried for your health, not being able to even match the slow pace of old men.’ Bucky wasn't quite done laughing, he certainly hadn't expected to enjoy this so much. Sam was glaring at both of them.

'The history books fail to mention what asses you two are.’

\---

Bucky and Steve were having lunch in the apartment when someone knocked. Steve got up to answer it. 'Hi Nat. You wanna come in?’

'Sure.’ Natasha came into the lounge and spotted Bucky. 'Glad you found Steve, he was getting really desperate. It was horrible.’

'No I wasn't!’

'Yes you were.’

'Ok, fine, maybe I was getting a little desperate,’ Steve said reluctantly, hoping no-one could notice the heat he felt in his cheeks. 'Anyway, I doubt you came around to say that?’

'No, I came over cause I got you a date. Girl named Susan from the cafe down the road. Tonight at 7, Italian place at the plaza.’ 

'Steve told me that you’re trying to set him up. Good luck with that, it's harder than it looks.’ He paused, 'And that's saying something for me, as it looked an awful lot harder back in the day, everything considered.’ 

Natasha stayed for a while longer, but Bucky was distracted the whole time. He would talk, but sometimes he'd see the other two looking at him as if they had asked him something he hadn't heard. Why'd he not like the idea of Steve being set up on dates? Why was it distracting him? He decided it was that he wanted Steve to be able to focus on helping him recover, and he hadn't been able to concentrate on anything with Peggy around. Sure, it was selfish to want Steve not to date purely for his own sake, but it wasn't like he would say. He wanted Steve to be happy, after all.

\---

Bucky was listening to old jazz on the gramophone when Steve returned to their apartment after the date. Bucky had been reluctant to make it more than a temporary lodging for him, but Steve had insisted, and he didn't really want to protest. He turned around and watched Steve walk in. ‘What happened? You seem down. Date not go so well?’ He hated himself for the slight happiness he felt. He hoped it didn't show.

'It was fine. For twenty minutes I guess. But after that she was so forward, it was like she thought we were a long term couple in our home, not two people who'd barely met in a packed restaurant! It was honestly terrifying, I've got two more of these to go, I'm not sure if I can handle it. What if they're all like her? What if she's tame comparatively?’ Steve was breaking down, quivering. Bucky knew Steve was the of the sort who took things slow, doing nearly nothing on a first date, but he also knew it would take a lot to break Steve down like this. He had thought the future was far better than the world he grew up in, but maybe there were parts that were worse. He walked over to Steve and hugged him, wanting to comfort him but not knowing what to say. And then the memories started.

_He was leaving America to fight. He hadn't said a proper goodbye to Steve, he hadn't wanted to admit it could be the last time they'd see each other. He was leaving everyone behind, he wouldn't let himself think he wouldn't come back, stronger, brave enough to admit how he felt._

_He was alone in that room, the one where Steve found him. He recognised him immediately, but it took him a few moments to realise it was real. Seeing him again brought it all back, and he realised no matter what happened, he’d never be brave enough to say what he wanted to say._

Then it clicked. He realised what he had forgotten. He had refused to consider it a possibility just that morning, but now he couldn't understand how he had ever questioned the idea. He was in love with Steve.


	3. Chapter 3

Steve woke up early the next morning. The date had gone badly, to say the least. Steve had been reluctant to be set up to begin with, but he was now close to stopping outright. He certainly didn't want two more dates like that one, but he also didn't want to not see it through. He wasn't the sort to give up, after all. He needed to distract himself, but he didn't know how. Bucky wasn't awake, so he couldn't talk to him. He tried looking at the news on his phone, which he still didn't know what to do with, but nothing struck his interest. Eventually, he just gave up, waiting for Bucky to wake, or for it to be late enough to go out. 

An hour and a half later, he, Bucky and Sam were eating breakfast in Starbucks after giving up on running due to Sam's complaints about the heat and Bucky. Bucky and Sam seemed to have already decided it was their life mission to piss the other off, and Steve was regretting the two meeting. He tried to act as the peacemaker but to no avail. He decided to try to stop their bickering and asked Bucky whether he wanted to train at the Tower with them, in the hope that he'd find someone other than himself that he got along with, as well as give him something to do.

'I don't think I'm ready to get back into fighting quite yet, maybe in a while. Plus, you really want me near the other Avengers if this is how I am with the only other one I've met?’ Bucky said quietly, not meeting his eye. Ever since he'd come back from that date last night, something had seemed up with Bucky, and Steve wondered what had happened. He figured it was best not to ask though, or that he should at least wait until they were alone.

'You’ve met Nat too.’

'That barely counts, I was distracted the whole time.’ He had been, hadn't he? Steve decided that he would ask about that when he asked about the whole eye contact thing. He had thought Bucky was back to himself, yet all of a sudden everything had changed. Maybe he just needed to give him time?

\---

‘What have those punching bags ever done to you Cap?’ He was in the training room and had been punching bags for almost an hour with a fierceness that surprised even him. Tony had been leaving the room when he asked. 'Everything ok?’

'You know how Nat’s setting me up? First date was last night, and it didn't go too well.’ He still hadn't told anyone other than Sam and Natasha about him having found Bucky, and figured now wasn't the time to mention it. 

‘Oh. Is it really worth all this though? You can't always have a good date. Now, me, on the other hand…’ Steve rolled his eyes, but Tony’s words actually comforted him.

‘Thanks Tony,’ He said, punching the bag once more, hard, before leaving the room. ‘Actually,’ he started, turning back around to face him, ‘Do you know where Nat is?’

‘I think she’s over in the lounge with Clint. Who knows why, thought she preferred training over talking about birds or drinking coffee or whatever Barton’s life revolves around.’

He left to go talk to Natasha, partially to complain, partially in the hope that she had a better date planned so he could get the first one out of his head. And if she didn’t, well, Clint was there, that was guaranteed to distract him, even if it would only be because he was teased constantly about his age or some other irrelevant thing.

'How did last night go Steve? She nice? I thought you two would get along really well.’

'Are you kidding? It was a disaster! Get along? Oh, sure, it was fine when we were just talking, but then she was trying to be all over me! It was horrific! I thought I could survive this, who knows, maybe even find someone nice, but if she's the sort you think good, then no, this won't work.’

'Is the Captain a bit concerned about modern dating? Didn't he realise that jazz and dancing died out in the 60s?’

'Congratulations Barton, you can't even say your jokes are clever now.’

Natasha laughed. 'Oh you just wait Steve. He'll find something smarter soon. Unlike you, you haven't changed in 70 years.’

'Why don't you try to make a joke about something other than my age? Technically Thor's older than me, you should be like this to him, not me.’

'Well, he kinda left looking for the stones, didn't he? And he's not as fun to mess with.’ Clint replied.

'Anyway,’ He drew out the word, half sighing, 'Can we get back to the topic?’

'Dancing in the 60s?’

He glared at Clint. 'Natasha? Please?’

'Sound a bit more desperate next time. I'm sorry about the date, I honestly thought it would work. I'll try to find you another girl soon if you want? Someone I know better? But other than how forward she was, it was fine?’

'I guess. I feel like there weren't enough similarities between us though.’

'Well-’

'Clint! Shut up for a second please!’

'You’re supposed to be on my side Nat.’

'Look at it that way then. You've gone so far with this that the person who should be on your side isn't. Now can you either be quiet or leave.’

'Thanks Nat.’ Steve was shocked. He knew Natasha was capable of snapping like that, he had seen it happen before, sometimes to him, but he had always assumed Clint was immune.

'Sorry Nat.’ She raised her eyebrows. 

'What about Steve?’

'You said I could either be quiet or leave, and I've decided to be quiet.’ He looked rather smug, and Steve rolled his eyes at him, but Natasha glared daggers. 

'Fine, sorry Captain. And now I'm leaving in shame.’ He stood up and started to walk out, before turning around to ask, 'We still having lunch Nat?’

'Of course, you really think something this foolish could cancel plans?’ 

Clint smiled. 'Just had to check you weren't on his side.’

‘Oh, no, definitely not.’ Steve feigned hurt when she said that, making Clint laugh.

‘Yes, Captain, there are people who prefer me over you. It surprises me too sometimes.’ Clint left.

'So, I'll get you a date by sometime next week. Someone who you can relate to a bit more, and someone I know will take it a bit slower. Sound good?’

'You’re not even giving me a chance to say no, are you?’

'Well, are you really the sort who quits halfway through?’

He nodded. 'I’ll do it.’

\---

He was waiting in the cafe for his date to show up. Emily, her name was. A week had flown by. He'd always had something to do, whether it had been explaining to Bucky the very limited knowledge he had of modern tech (Natasha had helped with this, he had tried having Sam over once, and, well, there might have been a few minor explosions), or missions, as a lot of Hydra bases had suddenly popped up. He looked up from his bagel to see her looking at him from the doorway. She had dusty blonde hair, about shoulder height, and wide brown eyes. He couldn't say Natasha had been lying when she said she was pretty. He got up and walked over to her. 'Emily? Sorry, I didn't notice you were there.’

'Hi. Whatever happened to the chivalry that makes old men so famous? This is disgraceful!’ She saw his alarm, and as he started stammering something about the bagel being delicious, she stopped him. 'It’s fine, I'm just joking around. I didn't realise you'd take it so seriously. Now, you gonna get me one of these supposedly delicious bagels or what?’

An hour later they were walking around the park side by side, fingers occasionally brushing against each other's. Steve was enjoying it, thinking that it was certainly a good thing he'd let Natasha set him up. 'So, you work for the CIA? Someone I used to live across the hall from works there, apparently it's a decent place. She said she prefers it to Shield.’

‘I’m not so fussed. I don't really get to stay in one place much, I'm only in New York every couple of months, the rest of the time I'm all over the place. Great pay though, and I love the travel.’

'Really? Where's the furthest you've been?’

'Last year there was a job in Australia. I spent a month on the other side of the world. Nice people, although it's so different there, and you can barely believe they're speaking English at times. And it was so hot! Over 100 degrees the whole time!’

'I’m not one for the heat, so sounds like I won't be going there.’

'Considering you spent 70 years in the Arctic, I kinda figured as much.’ She smiled as Steve looked at her, exasperated. 'Last one, I promise. Or at least, last one tonight.’

'So there'll be another night?’ He was slightly surprised, having had assumed it was going too well to be true.

'You got anything against that?’ Emily's phone buzzed. 'Sorry, something just came up. I've gotta dash, but Natasha can give you my number. Bye!’ She walked off, shocked that she had enjoyed the evening. She had expected not to, had only accepted because she had practically been forced to, but she really had. She'd been on a fair few dates recently, and all of them had let her down. Steve was the first guy she'd wanted to meet for a second time in a long while.

Steve was walking home when he noticed the video rental store. He realised that he hadn't shown Bucky any films yet, and decided to pick one up. 'What to pick, what to pick,’ he muttered to himself, looking at the shelves of DVDs that surrounded him. The Disney shelf caught his eye. 'That would be a good place to start.’ Before the war, he and Bucky had loved Walt Disney's cartoons, often using their little spare change to buy a seat in the cinema to watch one. He looked through the titles, trying to pick one he hadn't watched yet, but had heard of. There were so many to choose from though. A movie near the bottom of the shelf caught his eye. The Lion King. He picked it up and took it over to the counter.

'That’s an unusual choice for this time of day.’ 

'What can I say, I like Disney. Reminds me of my childhood.’ He walked the rest of the way home, wondering what Bucky's reaction would be. He had been surprised Disney was still around, but maybe Bucky would have expected it, or already knew? He almost hoped not, wanting to see the glee on his face.

When he returned to their apartment with a movie Bucky was sitting on the sofa, reading. He'd been shopping that day, and the fruit bowl was filled with plums. He didn't know why, but Bucky seemed to really like them. Well, he guessed he was no different, picking up a watermelon every week. Fruit had been a luxury when they grew up, but now they were incredibly commonplace. He was still getting used to the variety of food available, but he certainly found it one of the best parts of the modern day.

'Buck, I've brought a DVD home to watch.’

Bucky looked up, confused. 'A DVD?’

'You know how we used to watch cartoons in the cinema? Like that, except you put the DVD in the TV. Rented The Lion King, apparently it's really good. Disney's still around, you know.’ He wasn't disappointed in Bucky's reaction. 

'Really? Disney's still here? How many more movies? Are they still as good?’ Bucky's reaction was priceless, Steve had never seen anyone so excited.

'Didn’t know you were that obsessed Buck.’

'It's something that hasn't changed.’ He said quietly, and Steve looked at him in concern. 'What? You're saying you weren't the same? Anyway, can we just put it on?’

Steve started the film, and sat down beside Bucky. 'Oi, move over jerk, need some room.’

'Do you have to be so loud punk, I'm trying to watch the film.’ He moved over almost reluctantly, not taking his eyes off the screen.

'Me, being loud? You heard the volume of this song?’

'I would be glaring at you now if I wasn't too busy watching this.’

They watched the movie in silence for a while, until it reached the scene in the elephant graveyard, at which point Bucky couldn't help commenting. 'You know, Simba kinda reminds me of this dumbass I've met, who also has no sense of self-preservation.’

'Look who's talking now. And I'm flattered, Simba's cool. Also, you're basically saying you're Mufasa, the helicopter you are.’

'Can’t complain, that'd make me king!’ He smiled, turning back to the movie. 

They finished the movie quietly, occasionally making comments. Steve had turned to Bucky to say something when Nala found Simba in the jungle, but forgot what he wanted to say almost instantly. Just as he was about to turn back, the song reached its chorus, and for an instant Bucky glanced at him. _Can you feel the love tonight?_ He turned away instantly, and Steve could see his cheeks flushing a pale pink. What was that? His eyes returned to the movie, but he was struggling to concentrate. Had Bucky blushed? What for? And why had he struggled to look away? He barely realised when the movie was over.

'Why so fascinated by the credits Stevie?’ 

He shook his head, bringing himself back to the present, out of his thoughts. 'I dunno Buck. You wanna watch another movie next week?’

'Next week? What about tomorrow? There's 70 years to catch up on!’

'Sure, goodnight Bucky.’

'Night.’ As Steve started to walk away, Bucky remembered to ask, ‘Wait, how was the date?’

'It actually went really well.’ He turned back, grinning, for a second, before going to his room. He didn't see Bucky's reaction, the sad look in his eyes, the fake smile plastered on his face. But Bucky had seen the slight sadness, the restraint, in Steve's, hidden deep beneath the genuine grin. He wasn't sure even Steve knew it was there, and went to sleep wondering what it meant, whether his hopes could turn true.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I promised myself I'd go outside today, yet here I am, writing this fic after rewatching The Winter Soldier, trying to pick what to watch next, and I can't even pretend to be surprised.
> 
> Anyway, sorry this update took a bit longer


	4. Chapter 4

Bucky was bored. Moving into Steve's apartment had meant he had a lot less to do every day, as he no longer had to worry about finding somewhere to stay and picking something up to eat along the way. He now spent most of his time on the internet, trying to catch up with the years he'd missed. But catching up on history and music couldn't keep him entertained every day, and he really didn't feel up to it. He turned off his phone and stuck the sheet of paper he had written on to the wall. He would write down everything he found that he found interesting, leaving it for Steve to find. That morning he'd been listening to U2, and had written down a few of their titles for him to try. He wanted to actually do something that day, not just spend the day on Google. He left the apartment, figuring he needed some fresh air. He walked aimlessly through the streets, not paying attention to where he was. He bumped into a few people, who would glare at him before noticing his arm when they would pick up their pace. He winced, wishing that he had picked a shirt with sleeves, hating the effect his arm had on people. A while later, he realised he was standing in front of the Avengers Tower, and considered entering. Why not? He decided to go inside, planning to surprise Steve.

'An intruder has entered the premises. Scanning now.’ The voice was female, although it didn't quite sound right, seemingly coming from nowhere. He stopped in the doorway, confused. 'Identified as James Barnes.’ Seemed he couldn't surprise anyone after all.

‘Buck?’ Steve's voice called from a distance, and Bucky could hear footsteps coming towards him. 'Good to see you here! What changed your mind?’

'I just walked past, figured I may as well come in.’

Another figure stood in the doorway Steve had come from. A shorter man who vaguely reminded him of someone. 'Cap, who's this? Or, no, I know who he is, but why’s he here?’

'He showed up at my place a couple of weeks ago. He's been staying with me since then.’ Steve's face lit up as he said that, had been lighting up more and more since he'd seen Bucky at the door. 

Tony raised his eyebrows. 'Hmm, might be something other than friendship there.’ He said to himself, barely audible. But surely it didn't take a genius to figure that out? 'Might ask Nat what she thinks.’

‘What?’ His eyes widened, Bucky had heard him. He seemed to be turning pink, was that confirming his thoughts?

'Nothing. Nice to actually meet you by the way. I'm Tony Stark, in case you don't know.’ He laughed at Bucky's amazement.

'But you're a genius! I've heard a bit about you, and how you escaped the terrorists, and you're amazing!’

'Thanks,’ he replied, glad that his father wasn't mentioned. Although Howard had barely ever talked about Steve's best friend, so maybe they just hadn't spent much time together. 'You gonna join us inside, or are we all just gonna stand here?’ He asked after a few seconds of silence. 'I imagine you'd like to meet the others.’ He turned to Steve. 'And you've got some explaining to do. How come you never mentioned he was back?’

'I honestly don't know Tony. I just never got around to it. Sam and Nat forced it out of me, though.’

'Oh, so you told them?’

'I had to!’

'Also, he decided after trolling Sam with my sudden appearance it would be more fun to surprise you guys,’ Bucky added. 'Sadly, it seems I've spoiled the fun.’

'Trolling Sam? The great Captain America?’ He struggled to believe that it was true.

'Yes, of course. Why does that surprise you?’ Bucky had figured that the two knew each other well enough to know the person behind the mask, although apparently not. 'Anyway, we were going to go inside?’

They walked in, and Bucky stood for a second in the doorway of the training room, amazed. The room was filled with equipment, and yet barely any of it seemed to be in use. Natasha was near the edge of the room, sharpening a knife while talking to someone. There was a girl in the opposite corner surrounded by glowing red weights that seemed to be floating. Floating? Surely he was seeing things. His confusion must have shown on his face, because Steve started to explain that some of the others had powers more, well, to him, magical than strength and speed. 'I should probably introduce you. Unless you don't want?’ Even though he gave him the option not to, Steve clearly wanted him to meet the others, so Bucky agreed. 

'Why not? I'm here and all.’ The introductions were rushed, and Bucky was confused half the time. A robot? A guy whose power was being a brilliant archer? A teen with what he could only describe as magic powers? Obviously the new century was far more unusual than he had thought. He ended up talking to the guy with a bow, who he realised was the one Natasha had been talking to earlier. Clint, his name was, he thought.

'You think our powers are wacky? Man, you didn't even meet the more insane ones. There used to be a god on the team and a scientist who turned into a green monster. We're all tame by comparison.’

'How is that even possible?’ It didn't seem like he'd be able to get used to this anytime soon, in fact, he almost felt like he was getting more confused as time went by.

'Don't ask me, how’d I know? Anyway, I've gotta go, there's some food across the road calling my name.’

Bucky was left alone for a minute before he decided to go over to talk to the magic girl and the robot, curious as to what they were like. Surely a robot wouldn't be able to act fully human, although to him it was still unbelievable that robots could exist, so maybe science had progressed far more than he could have thought. As he was walking over, however, Sam blocked his path. 'I wouldn't go over to them when it's just those two. Could be quite awkward for you.’

'Why?’

'They may or may not be a couple, I'm still not quite sure. They act like it though.’

'A robot? Machinery in a relationship? How much has the world changed?’

'It must be quite hard for someone as ancient as you to believe.’

‘I thought the age jokes were supposed to be for Steve. Get some creativity will you.’

‘You’re older than me Buck, if anything the age jokes should go to you rather than me.’ They hadn’t noticed that Steve had joined them.

Bucky turned towards him. ‘But at least I don’t act like I’m 100.’

‘Actually-’ Sam started, before being cut off by Steve.

‘I dunno about that, you're much more confused with modern life than I ever was.'

'Because I actually try to learn about it instead of just living like it's still the 40s!’

'I spend my time with these guys, how do you think that's anything like the 40s?’

‘You’re not helping yourself by using your friends as your first point of denial.’ They quickly turned to bickering, and Sam left the pair to argue with each other.

\---

‘So, what’d you think of the rest of the Avengers?’ Steve asked while the two of them were walking back to the apartment. ‘I know they can be a bit much sometimes, but they’re nice when you get to know them.’

‘They’re cool. And Sam was the only one who was, as you say, a bit much, but somehow I expected that.’

‘So, you gonna go back sometime?’

‘Yeah, I reckon I will.’

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the slow update (and that this is sort of just a filler chapter), my week's been a mess.


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry this chapter's short.

Natasha's phone buzzed. A text popped up on her locks teen from Emily. _I'm not gonna be back for a few months, take your chance to set Steve up the final time (while you have the chance!)_ The previous month, she had set her FBI friend Emily up with Steve, and it had been far more successful than she could have hoped. She had thought a second date would be a possibility, but not them being together for over a month. She couldn't remember seeing Emily any happier, and Steve seemed to be happy. Natasha didn't want to risk messing this up by setting Steve up again, but then she did enjoy trying to find someone for him.

She hadn't decided whether she would set Steve up again when he mentioned it the next day. 'Emily said you were going to set me up again while she's away?'

'Er,' she hesitated, still not sure it was the best idea, 'Yeah, yeah, I did.' It was a split second decision, and she regretted agreeing immediately. 'Unless you'd prefer not?' She hoped Steve would hear the hope in her voice, but it seemed that he either didn't, or decided to ignore it.

'I'm not one to back out of a deal. I gotta finish what I started.' He noticed the wince that flashed on her face, and added, 'You can make sure it won't work if you really want, if it eases your conscience. But I don't it could ruin anything anyway.'

'Fine. You may regret this.' Internally she was thinking that she would too, and in the short term she was right.

\---

'Something up?' Tony asked after he notice Natasha lying on the sofa, seemingly deep in thought. 'You look like you're regretting something.'

'Emily's out of town for a while, and I've kinda agreed to set Steve up on his third date while she's gone? But this could go really badly, what happens if he prefers the new date, or if she reminds him why he wasn't dating, or something worse?' 

'It'll be fine Nat. You know what you're doing, you won't mess this up. I've seen them, I doubt it's possible to mess this up.' He stopped for a second. 'That being so, how about we make this last one some fun?' He had an idea, but knew he needed to warm Natasha up to it slowly, because it was certainly risky. He'd seen the way they looked at each other, there was certainly something there, and he needed to take this opportunity to make it happen. He figured if anyone could set it up to have as little consequence as possible, it was Natasha.

'Some fun? What are you thinking?' She liked the idea, that was why she had decided to do this all in the first place (yeah, Steve needed it too, but that was just convenient). But she couldn't think of what Tony would be suggesting.

'I was thinking about picking someone he'd never dare ask out otherwise.' Slowly does it, he couldn't just blurt it out. He needed to make Natasha impatient, curious, more likely to agree.

'I think that was how this was going in the first place, considering he wouldn't ask anyone out.'

'Oh, no, I'm thinking bout someone he wouldn't ask even if he didn't need this.'

She furrowed her brow. 'Now I'm listening. But why?'

'Let's call this an experiment. But it'll be hard to do.'

'Everything you say makes me more and more worried. But I'm up for a challenge.'

'Good. Now, just checking, did you restrict the agreement to girls?'

'No, it was kind of implied though. Why?' Tony stood looking at her, waiting for her to answer her question herself. 'Wait, you wanna try... But why?' It suddenly came to her. 'Bucky. Well, that could be interesting. I'm in.'

\---

'Hey, Steve, I got you your third date.' She had waited till he had been about to leave to tell him, delaying it subconsciously, but also giving him less time to make up an excuse not to go. She really wanted to see what would happen, but she was regretting agreeing to it at the same time.

'That sure was fast! When's it gonna be?'

'Tomorrow night. I've reserved a table at this really nice place.'

'Reserved a table?' He was taken aback, used to Natasha just saying where they would meet. 

'The place often gets full,' she said. Her actual reasoning was to make sure he and Bucky realised what was going on. Steve was clueless at times, he would think it just coincidental otherwise.

'Expensive?'

'Nah, not really. It'll be fine. You'll enjoy this one, I promise, even if it doesn't seem great to start.' She desperately hoped that she was right.

\---

'Bucky's agreed, although he seemed reluctant. Steve fine with it?'

'Yeah, he was kinda sus about me reserving a table for it though.'

'Well, they've both agreed, now it's time for the fun!' Natasha nodded halfheartedly, suddenly realising how badly this could go. She realised she didn't know if Bucky would be able to take it as a laugh. She realised it could make it really awkward for them after. She realised that it could ruin things for Steve just when they had started going better.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The date next chapter! Been waiting so long to get to write this next part yay!


	6. Chapter 6

Steve had been waiting outside the restaurant for ten minutes before realising he knew nothing about the girl he was waiting for. He wouldn't be able to identify her without asking everyone who went past whether they were who he was waiting for. He figured that he may as well just go to the table and wait for them to show up. It was taking a fair while, with him still sitting by himself half an hour later. He ordered a wine, for the first time resentful that he couldn't get drunk, because at least that would distract him from having had his date not show. He was taking out his phone to text Natasha to complain (two out of three of his dates had gone really badly) when he saw someone walking up to him in the corner of his eye. ‘Your table, sir. I'll return soon for your order.’ He looked up, confused. The tables next to him were full, but the waiter had said sir, it made no sense. He looked at the man the waiter had brought over, who looked as confused as Steve felt.

'Bucky?’ He was slightly more confused, Natasha was setting him up on a date, wasn't she? So why hadn't the girl showed up but Bucky had? 'What’re you doing here?’ 

'Could ask the same of you pal. Tony set me up on a date, they must have just taken me to the wrong table.’ At that moment he remembered that Tony had thought there might be something between the two of them, and this seemed to be the sort of thing he would do. This wasn't an accident, and it was going to be a nightmare. He could feel his cheeks turning red, and hoped Steve either wouldn't notice or would misunderstand.

'Huh. Nat set me up, odd coincidence.’ He saw Bucky blush, and was about to ask why when he saw how he was looking at him, eyebrows raised as if he was waiting for him to figure something out, but he didn't know what Bucky expected him to know. He watched as he sat down in front of him, taking up the menu, half concentrating on picking a meal, half watching him with his eyebrows still raised. Steve sat there for a while, head tilted slightly to one side, waiting for Bucky to give in and explain. 

'Nat and Tony spent a lot of time together yesterday didn't they? Before Nat organised this for you?’ He said pointedly. 

'Finally,' Steve muttered under his breath. This had happened a few times growing up, but it had only ever taken a minute for Bucky to give in, and yet this time it had taken almost five. ‘Yeah, they did actually. Kinda surprised about that.’ He sat in silence a moment longer, before his eyes widened, mouth forming a perfect 'O’. 

'Took ya long enough.’

'Wait, did you know?’ 

Bucky's face blanched, realising he had started digging a pit for himself. 'No, I didn't. Of course I didn't! I just realised as I sat down, and I may not know him as well as you do, but this does seem like the sort of thing Tony'd do.’

'It is. But I don't get why Natasha agreed to this, surely she'd realise how awkward it'd be.’

'Er, yeah, I dunno.’ Him mentioning awkwardness almost seemed to be the reason they sat in silence until the waiter came around for their orders, as if it had made them focus on the fact that this was a date. 'I'll have your strongest wine and the special please.’

‘Strongest? Thought you weren't fussed on the taste?’ Bucky had only ever drunk beer in the war, saying that he couldn't stand wine, and wasn't too much of a fan of alcohol in any form. 

'I need the alcohol.’ He paused for a second. 'My version of the serum doesn't completely stop its effects, it just takes a lot more.' He added before Steve could say anything. Steve ordered quickly, the slightest amount of concern showing on his face, imperceptible to anyone who didn't know him.

‘Surely you don't need it, you never have before, and you've been through some tough times. Why should this be any harder?’ He realised how ridiculous that question would seem, and added, 'I’m sorry, you don't have to answer that. Don't answer that.’ He couldn't shake the hope inside him that he couldn't place, something about what he might have answered, but he also dreaded hearing his response. ‘Let’s just forget that we've been set up, pretend we're just hanging out. Like it's the 40s again, our dates haven't shown, and we're just at the local bar eating some cheap food that would make us throw up the next day. Except that this place is ridiculously pricey.’ Even as he said that though, he was thinking about how useful it would be to be able to get even the slightest bit tipsy. Because for some unknown reason he couldn't quite get the fact that he was on a date with Bucky out of his mind.

'Trust me, I need it.’ The same thing was going on in his mind, except he knew why.

A fair few drinks later and he was only just starting to get tipsy. 'You sure you want to keep ordering more Buck? You're going to end up spending a few hundred dollars on wine at this rate. And you look like you're going to be sick after every sip.’

'I’m fine. It's disgusting, but I need it.’ His voice was slightly slurred, but that seemed to be the only effect the wine had had so far.

'Buck. You don't. There's no reason you would.’

‘No, there is, I just can't say.’ For a second he thought he saw a flash of something on Steve's face, hope, maybe? But he denied it to himself the next second, not wanted his own hopes to go up.

'Well, can you at least stop before you get too drunk to stand up? I prefer you sober.’

‘Fine, just let me have one more bottle.’ He couldn't stand the concern on Steve's face, looking at him like he thought something was really wrong, like he needed to be protected. ‘But it's not your job to protect me or whatever you're trying to do.’

‘You mean care? It is Buck, I don't like seeing you like this, I never have.’ He could feel the heat in his eyes, but didn't want to let Bucky see the tear that was close to falling.

‘You mean there have been other times?’ His memories were not all back, but he had thought he would remember something like this, it was the painful memories that had resurfaced fastest.

'Once. There was this girl, you really liked her, you'd been dating a couple of months before she left you for some guy who joined the army as soon as he could. I could never understand why she left you. You took it real bad, spent the night drinking, and I couldn't do anything. You could barely stand the next day, I broke a rib trying to help you home.’

'Steve, I'm…’

'No, don't try to apologize.’

'But…’ He looked at Steve's face, and saw the tears that he was trying so desperately to hide. He knew that trying to say something would make it worse, and set down the glass that had been in his hand. He pushed it over to Steve. ‘Here. I'll stop.’ They sat for a minute, silent. ‘You got any better stories of our old life? Something to lift the mood?’

'Well, somehow life in the Depression wasn't all laughter. But there were plenty of good times. We went to Rockaway Beach once, had to get a ride in a truck because we spent all our money on hotdogs. They were great hotdogs though. Probably made us sick the next day, I can't remember.’ He paused, looking at Bucky, watching his face, wide-eyed as he remembered.

'I was trying to win something for a girl, wasn't I?’

'Yeah, you were.’ He smiled, 'The amount of times you'd spend our cash on girls was ridiculous. I'd buy some food, and you'd buy something for a girl, and maybe a roller coaster ride for the two of us. It annoyed me so much, but looking back I wouldn't have it another way.’ He laughed at Bucky's protests, trying to tell him that he should have said something, not yet remembering that he had. ‘Oh, and we watched the first Walt Disney flick together, had to save up for a month to go. It took a few of them for you to like them, but I was in love immediately. I still remember you throwing a pillow at my head when I started singing one of the songs from Snow White, and then you joined in even louder a minute later. I think it was watching those cartoons that made me start drawing.’

Bucky was smiling, but he looked confused at the same time. 'I can't remember that. I remember all sorts of things, but not singing songs from cartoons. We do that often, or just the once?’

‘A few times. We sang a bit over the campfire with the Commandos, there was this one time when I tried to make us all sing instead of howl because you had a headache. That only made them howl louder.’

'How nice of them.’

‘They didn't like me trying to stop them.’ He smiled at Bucky, and their eyes caught for a minute, neither looking away. He noticed suddenly that his head had slowly been turning to maintain eye contact, and saw that Bucky had been slowly moving his chair around to be closer to him. He nudged his chair closer, and they were almost sitting next to each other instead of opposite. Bucky was slowly leaning in closer, closer, until all Steve could see was his face. Then, in a flash, Bucky's mouth was on his. Steve sat still in shock for a few seconds before he could react, realising that this was what he wanted, what he had always wanted. He went to kiss him back, but Bucky was pulling away, bright red. 

'I’m sorry, I'm so sorry,’ he said, 'I shouldn't have done that.’ Steve whispered a protest, leaning back in, but Bucky stood up, not seeing Steve's reaction, thinking he'd just made a huge mistake. 'I guess I'd better go.'

'No, Bucky, wait.' He stopped for a second, but didn't turn, and left the restaurant in a hurry, certain that he had messed up, had ruined the one true friendship he had. Steve watched him go, desperate to chase after him, but he knew that would only make him leave faster. He just wished he hadn't taken so long to realise what he really felt, that he'd kissed him back when he had the chance.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> That was really fun to write! (Well, except for that last paragraph, sorry about that)


	7. Chapter 7

Bucky dashed out of the restaurant, too embarrassed to look back. Steve had called out to him, but he didn't want to turn, he didn't want him to see his face, and wasn't sure he wanted to see Steve's either, terrified of how he might have reacted. He was at their apartment in a minute, locking the door and leaning against it before he realised that Steve lived there too, that he couldn't hide there. But he was breathing hard, and knew he couldn't run further, not before he caught his breath. He decided the best thing to do would be to pretend sleep, knowing Steve wouldn't try to wake him up until morning.

\---

He woke up before the sun rose the next morning, desperate to avoid his roommate. He left the apartment, trying not to make a noise. Heading in the opposite direction to where they usually went in the morning, he looked around trying to find someplace open, not wanting to spend hours walking aimlessly. After eventually giving up, realising that there was nowhere to go, Bucky headed back towards the apartment to talk to Steve, with a sudden burst of courage that surprised himself. But when he rounded the corner of their street, and saw a blond head coming out of the building, he ran back out of sight. He realised he wasn't ready to face Steve yet, and wasn't sure when he would be. He found himself a few blocks away from the Tower, buying a late breakfast from a small cafe. He walked out, distracted, not noticing the voice calling his name. Someone tapped his shoulder, and he glanced over his shoulder, blanching, worrying that it was Steve. It took him a moment to realise that he wasn't looking at Steve, he was looking at Clint. 'How hard is it to hear someone yelling at you? Going deaf in your old age?'

'If you make one more age joke...'

'What? You'll kill me? Considering your, er, history, that actually holds weight, so you can't say that!'

He glared at Clint for a second, before his face lifted into a smile. 'Who says it'd be an empty threat?'

'Wow.' Clint said, slightly surprised. 'You know, sometimes I'm surprised that your best bud is Captain America, personalities seem to clash a little.' He said it lightheartedly, expecting a laugh, or maybe just an eyeroll, but Bucky immediately stopped smiling when he mentioned Cap. When he noticed Clint looking at him, head cocked to the side in confusion, he quickly regained a somewhat forced smile. 

'What's wrong? Something happen between you two?'

'You could say that. But I thought you'd know, it surely would've been mentioned at training.'

'Training? Who goes to training before 11? I'm not like you guys who have nothing to do other than train, I have other interests.'

'Yes, of course. You need to spend half an hour drinking coffee before you can even think about training, don't you? And I suppose archery doesn't need the athleticism the rest of us do.'

'Excuse me? Just cause you're not able to fight aliens with weaponry barely designed for fighting trained people doesn't mean you have to be salty about it.'

'Well, I gotta complain of the hypocrisy. You go on and on about me being ancient, and yet you use a weapon that's hundreds of years older than me, and seem to be proud of it.'

'So?' He paused, waiting for a response that didn't come. 'Anyway, I was on the way to training, wanna join me?'

'Don't think I'll go to the tower today.' Bucky's reply was blunt, trying to make sure Clint wouldn't argue. But, of course, he did.

'You look like you need company, come for that even if you don't do anything. Not like I was gonna do much anyway.'

'I dunno,' he said reluctantly. He did want company, but he didn't want to run across Steve.

'Come on. This time of day, everyone'll be in the training room, if you're avoiding Cap just don't go in there.' He paused for a moment. 'I'm not taking no for an answer.'

'Fine.'

\---

He had to admit, he was glad for the company. He hadn't thought about the previous night for an hour, but it all suddenly came back to him when Tony walked past. 'How was last night?' 

Bucky stood, shocked. 'You don't know? Hasn't he told you?'

'No...' Tony was worried, looking at Bucky's face which was quickly turning red, and Clint's shock behind him.

'Wait, this has something to do with Tony too?' Clint asked, before saying to Tony, 'I don't think you should've brought that up, I dunno anything about what's going on, but it isn't good.'

'Isn't good? Ya think?' Bucky was livid. 'What did you think was going to happen Stark? I thought you were supposed to be smart!'

'What happened? You can't just tell with no explanation.' He was trying to keep calm, trying to lessen the tension, but it didn't seem to be working. And when he concentrated, he realised Bucky's was embarrassed.

'I made a mistake. A big one. And it's gonna ruin everything,' he said softly.

'Wait, I thought this was Tony's fault? Why are you blaming yourself?' 

'You ok with him knowing?' Tony asked, trying not to do anything that could annoy Bucky. He gave a slight shrug, which he took as confirmation. 'I set Bucky up on a blind date, as you can see it didn't go great.'

'Isn't Cap supposed to be involved in this somehow?'

Tony hesitated, realising how badly it sounded when he was being blunt. 'Er... Yeah, that's who I set him up with.'

'What?! Even I can see that's a bad idea!'

'Well, apparently Nat couldn't, so seems you're the only one.'

'Nat as well? What's going on with you guys, all out of your minds? But Bucky, feel free to continue yelling at Tony, I'll do it for you if you don't.'

'Wait, no. Before you start yelling, please tell us what this huge mistake was?' Tony asked, hoping Bucky was just overreacting.

'Umm...' he hesitated, not wanting to say, but knowing that he had to. 'I kinda kissed him?'

\---

The floor below, Steve and Natasha were having a similar conversation. 'He kissed you? I didn't see that coming.' 

'Neither did I.' Natasha realised that there was the slightest smile hidden beneath his anger. 

'Wait, are you... happy about that?'

'My best friend has disappeared into thin air, just after I'd found him after thinking he had been dead since '45. Why'd I be happy?'

'Because there's a smile hidden beneath all that?'

'Ok, fine. It made me realise that I love him, that I always have. So yeah, I guess I'm kinda happy. But that doesn't stop me from being pissed that you did this with no warning, and have probably ruined everything.'

'Steve... If you kissed him back he'd have to have realised.'

\---

'It's not like you know how he felt about that.' Clint said, breaking the silence.

'He just did nothing, was completely still the whole time. I almost feel like he moved in again after I learnt back, but I'm probably just imagining things. I doubt he actually did.'

\---

'Oh. Well, that makes it harder. You tried talking to him?'

'Yeah, I was just going to talk to him, when I have no clue where he is.'

'That didn't stop you before.'

'It's not like I was even near succeeding last time.'

\---

'Talk to him, maybe you can work things out.'

'And what do I do when he asks why I did that?'

'You tell the truth.'

'Don't listen to Tony. He got you into this mess, but it won't be him getting you out of it.'

'Oh yeah? You just watch.'

'Anyway, what you gotta do is try and figure out what Cap's thinking, and well, I dunno, pretend you were drunk if he isn't interested.'

\---

'But what if he was not thinking clearly? He'd had so much to drink, it could have just been a huge mistake. I dunno what I'd do!'

'Was he acting drunk?'

'Well, no... But what if?'

'Listen, you just gotta talk to him, and it's gotta be you. I'm sorry I started this, I wish I could do more to help.'

\---

'Talk to him. Avoiding him will just make things harder. Better to bring it up now than later.'

'Can't you do something to help Tony? You started this, I know I've gotta end it, but can you at least try to get me there?'

'You've seen how this went. I don't think that'd be a good idea.'

'Well, you have to try!'

'Ok, ok, I will.' He left the room, thinking he'd talk to Steve, try to figure out what he was thinking, give Bucky a heads up. But the training room was empty. He noticed the hook for the punching bags was broken. 'Yikes,' he said to himself. 'Cap's not too happy.' He worried, equipment broke all the time (the others were sure lucky he was a billionaire), but that had been made to last.

'Cap?' he called out, 'You still here?' He heard footsteps behind him, and turned around to see Natasha, who was visibly upset.

'Why did I agree to this? Why did you have to suggest this?' She sighed. Her voice was quiet, but it was said with the force of a yell. 'I've never seen him so broken.'

'Listen, I never thought,' he stopped, trying to decide how to put it, 'That what I thought I was seeing would be true.' There, he'd said it. Too bluntly, but he'd admitted that he'd thought this might happen. He just hoped Natasha wouldn't tell anyone else.

'You,' she paused, 'You're telling me you suspected Bucky might... feel that way?' She was mad, but there was a slimmer of hope in there too. Maybe that meant it hadn't been a mistake, as Steve half-believed.

'Yes.' He searched Natasha's face, looking for anything other than anger. He thought he saw something else flash over her features, but couldn't quite tell. A moment later, it was gone.

'You're telling me, that when I was trying to pick a date for him that wouldn't destroy the relationship he is currently in, you suggested one that you thought might work out?!'

'I don't know what I was thinking. And if you were so desperate not to ruin anything, why did you agree to it?'

'I thought you'd thought it through! I thought it'd just be a laugh! But no, now Steve's all upset because who knows what's gonna happen, who knows if Bucky actually kissed him on purpose or not! And we're to blame. We're to blame for possibly ruining a friendship that survived decades, that survived mind washing for God's sake!'

'Did he want Bucky to have kissed him accidentally?' Tony asked, quiet. 'Does he think things can go back to how they were if it was?'

'What?' Why was Tony suddenly calm and collected? Hadn't he heard what she'd just said?

'The answer to this is all in Steve's reaction. We can fix it that way. But to do that, you need to tell me.'

'No,' she replied, 'He loves Bucky, you can't really see how happy he is under all his worry about what's gonna happen, but he is.'

Tony grinned. 'Well, that makes it easy, no one has to lie, everyone lives happily ever after, the end. Except that there'll be a bunch of monsters trying to kill us all cause you know, superheroes.'

He raced back to tell Bucky that he had a chance. He decided against straight up telling him Steve loved him, thinking that Steve should be the one to say. But when he returned to the room they had been in, it was empty. He searched the Tower. Not a trace of Bucky. Turning to Clint, who had been in the kitchen making coffee, he asked, 'Where's Bucky?'

'He left,' he said casually, not understanding why Tony got so infuriated. 

'Did he say anything about why?'

'Something about needing some space to think. Apparently an almost empty skyscraper isn't roomy enough.'

'He'll be back?'

'Reckon he was making an excuse to run off. Might not be long, hopefully just a couple of days.'

'And you let him? If he had waited just a few minutes, if you had delayed him, all would've been good, but no, you had to let him run off.'

'Wait, you could've fixed this?'

'I dunno if I can anymore. But I'm going to try.'


	8. Chapter 8

Steve looked down at the address on the slip of paper in his hand. The address that he hoped led to Bucky.

\---

It had been six months since he'd left, and only a week ago had they found anything that led to him. Steve had waited a couple of days after Bucky left to start looking, thinking that maybe he'd just come back. But apparently not. That third day, he asked everyone in the Tower if they could help. After Washington, he had thought he could find Bucky himself, but he realised now that he couldn't. 

'He’s got a phone, right?’ Tony asked. After Steve nodded, he added, 'Give me his number, I can try to track his phone.’ As it started ringing, Tony immediately set to work, trying to pinpoint where it was being received. 'Um, you expect him to be a fair distance away right? This is saying he's in Brooklyn.'

Steve's eyes widened. He went to look at the screen showing the location, and frowned. 'That's saying he's in my building!' He grinned. 'He's back! But I thought he left his keys?'

'He, er, I guess he probably left his phone behind. Sorry for getting your hopes up.' There was silence for a minute, everyone trying to think of something they could do. 

'Why don't we go the other way around this? Instead of trying to figure out where he is, figure out where he isn't?' Natasha asked, breaking the silence. 'Like, he'd want to be somewhere he could understand the people right?'

'Yeah, but who knows what languages Hydra taught him?'

'Hydra only made everyone learn European languages, so I doubt he'll be in Asia. But I can't eliminate anywhere else.' She said bluntly. 'Is there anything you know Steve?'

'He doesn't really like the heat I guess? But that still leaves all of Europe and a bunch of other places.'

'Um, he couldn't be settled down yet right? So couldn't we just search for him with his passport?' Steve looked at Clint like he was a genius, just about to say so, when Natasha interrupted.

'Good idea, but you realise he's probably using a fake right? There is no way he'd use his own name.' She paused. 'But, if he's going anywhere far, he would still be traveling. How about we tell airports, train stations, the sort, to be looking for a guy who fits his description?'

'A full blown international search? I don't know if that'd turn out too well,' he paused. 'But give it a try. Anything that means I might find him.'

\---

'Salut! Vorbiți engleză?' 

'A little,' the man replied with a slight wince, not quite sure he would know enough. 

'Thanks, this trip is last minute so I didn't get the time to learn much of the language. Has anyone moved in here recently?’ 

The man nodded frantically, worried. He had thought the new guy was trouble, and here was someone who looked an awful lot like Captain America looking for him. ‘6th floor, on your… right,’ he said in broken English. 'He does not talk to anyone.’

'Thanks.’ He was surprised to see a smile appear on Steve's face.

The apartment was almost empty. A small sofa and the bed took up most of the space, and at first glance seemed to be the only things there. Looking around, Steve could understand why the man he'd met had seemed so worried about Bucky, as the apartment didn't look like the place of a rule abiding citizen. He moved into the kitchen, spotted a notebook, and picked it up. There were pages of notes about what had happened since the war, and then, at the back, a few phone numbers. He saw his and smiled, glad to know that maybe Bucky would have came back on his own. But he also wished he hadn't seen it, because then he could have pretended that Bucky couldn't find his number, rather than choosing to talk to Clint over him.

\---

'Hey, Cap, you might wanna see this,' Clint called out across the room. He hesitated a moment - would it just be another prank - before heading over. Clint nodded towards his phone, and he looked down, confused. _Hi, it's been a while, but I need someone to talk to, dying of solitude over here. I'm not ready to come back though._

'Who's it from?' 

'Bucky I think. At least, there's no one else it could be. Dunno why he texted me though.' He watched Steve's face flash from hope to happiness to... was that jealousy? But it was gone in a moment, he regained his composure and told him to talk to Bucky for him. 'You're the only friend he has that isn't involved in what happened. Except Sam, if you can call them friends. It'll take time for everything to get back to how it was, but this is a start.' Steve tried not to let thoughts show on his face, wanting to seem calm, but inside his head was a mess, a dozen emotions running wild. 

'I'll try. But it might take a while. Not the sort of thing you can just come back and pretend didn't happen.' He saw the look of protest he was being given, 'I know you're not going to pretend it didn't happen Steve, but I don't think Bucky got that memo.' 

'Steve?' He was so used to being Captain America to most in the Tower that hearing his name surprised him. 

'You're gonna make me regret that, aren't you? One second of being nice, trying to be a friend instead of just that random guy you work with, and it's gonna haunt me forever.' Steve's eyebrows rose, and Clint wished he could take back what he had just said. 

'Trying to be a friend now? You're lucky I need us on good terms, otherwise yeah, you'd regret that.' He looked over Clint's shoulder. 'I'm also very lucky that it looks like Tony heard, I would not have survived not being able to give you hell. So now at least he can instead.' 

'Force him not to mention it or else I'm not replying to this,' he said waving his phone. 'I've got all the power you realise? You're effectively my slave until this is done.' 

'But Clint,' he said, mocking hurt, 'I'm your friend! You don't do that to friends!' He shrunk under his glare. He certainly seemed serious. 'Sorry, will do.'

\---

He turned at the sound of Bucky's voice. 'Steve?'

'Sorry to barge in on you like this, but, well, it's been six months, and-' He had planned what he would say earlier, had been thinking about it just before, but now that he was actually talking to Bucky, he just couldn't remember what he had been meaning to say.

'I know it's been a while, and you never were the most patient person, but I'm sorry, I'm not ready to come back. I'm not ready to talk about it. Sometimes starting over is the best thing to do, and I think for me, it's the way to go.'

'All it would take is one burst of courage, and then everything would be fine, you'd come back and we could pretend this didn't happen.' He was talking to himself, reminding himself how easy it should be to forget the six months had passed, that if he just told Bucky, then surely he'd come back in an instant, but Bucky heard, and misunderstood.

'I'm sorry Stevie, but I can't just forget that night never happened. And now that you know, it'll be so much harder to be so close constantly without thinking about how I feel. Before, at least you had no clue so I could pretend there was nothing there, but now I can't. I wish I could come back, but I can't. Not knowing you don't feel the same.' There were tears in his eyes, and he didn't think he could handle much more. Seeing Steve open his mouth to say something, he quickly added, 'Don't try to fight me on this, there's no point. Maybe I'll come back someday, maybe I won't. But I guess this is goodbye. I wish it wasn't, but it is. I wish that I didn't have to do what I did. I wish that I had at least done something less bold, something easier to recover from. I wish...' he rambled on, holding the door open for Steve to leave. He was trying to make sure that he had something to do to distract him from the tears that were falling from his eyes, from the tears that were drawing lines down Steve's face. He was trying to stop Steve from having a chance to speak, a chance to say something that would make him hesitate, a chance to make him close the door, making it all a billion times harder. Steve starting walking towards him, no, towards the door - he couldn't let himself think about anything else, Steve, door, Steve, door - and he finished talking just before he passed. 'If only you felt the same.'

Steve paused as he heard this, and turned to face him. 'But Bucky, I do.' And Steve was kissing him, fiercely at first, but it soon became gentle. He could taste the salty tears that had stopped flowing, and both just wanting it to last forever, catching up on all the years they hadn't had the chance. When they eventually parted, hand in hand, Steve asked, 'You consider coming back now?'

'I'm about to start packing.'

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> That was surprisingly fun (and at times painful) to write! 
> 
> What'd you think?


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